Live Your Life

By Alli Zall - May 23, 2022
Categories: General

Living my life in fear of what others will say or think kept me stuck fro a long time. I was a pleaser and do-gooder, someone who wanted to make sure that my actions was making everyone around me happy. 

When you stay in a relationship because is seems easier or don’t want to make waves in your life, upset others, make others uncomfortable, go against the norm isn’t you actually living your authentic life. This is sacrificing your true self for the happiness of others. While popular demand may think this is an act of nobility and selflessness, I disagree. I think it is an act of martyrdom and leads to a lack of self trust. 

We can’t control others feelings. Staying in a relationship because you don’t want to disrupt anyone’s comfortable life, while you grow more and more bitter and full of lack luster is living a life of integrity. 

I am NOT SAYING, ‘leave your relationship’. I AM saying, say the things that seem hard to say. 💥Advocate for yourself

💥Ask for what you want

💥Have your own back

💥Trust yourself

When you do these things you are a living example of how to get what you want out of life. By living life this way it actually gives you the space to care for the other’s around you. You’re not to manage their feelings, rather standing in your authority. When you say or do the hard thing, that may seem like the unpopular thing, you begin to live life on your terms. Part of being of a human who desires to evolve is getting uncomfortable, tackling the hard task and coming out of the other side still alive, ok and actually a stronger version of yourself. 

Why do so many of us live in fear of what others may say or do.

The best and most healing relationships are the ones where two people say the hard things , hold space for one another. Ask for what they need. 

Buttttt we don’t know what we need unless we truly know ourselves and live our lives in a way that honors our trueness. 

In order to have your dream life, one must first dream it up. Second, believe in it. Things that hold you back or keep you stuck don’t happen with out your permission. Staying in your power, remaining determined, and holding belief in your vision is the only way to make it happen. 

Staying in a place/relationship/job where you are not happy is not honoring yourself. It’s actually being a martyr. Are you staying because it’s just easier. are you staying because you’re afraid to say the hard thing. Are you staying because you don’t want other people to be upset with you. Are you staying because it is the way it has always been done?

We get stuck in our lives because of all these reasons and yet none of those reasons have your best interest at hand. These reasons don’t honor you and support you. These reasons are people pleasing. 

Sometimes we have to disrupt the world we know, even if it makes other people uncomfortable. And even if they let you know. Sameness or being stagnant rarely makes an impression. 

If being bold and breaking out of the mold speaks to you, you need no one to grant you permission. 

Truly consider the people who decide to judge the choices you make in your life 

Blaming the place/relationship/job for your unhappiness is a faulty thought.